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Please read these things before following me. (and please “like” this post to let me know you’ve read it!)
If you know me originally from offline, please send me a message letting me know that you have stumbled across my blog and please ask my permission before following. There is a small handful of people I know “IRL” who I am comfortable having follow my blog. Many of those people know who they are already because we have spoken explicitly about it and I have given them permission to follow me on tumblr. I just ask that you get my consent before following, and that you be understanding and respectful if I do not offer my consent.
If you think this is ridiculous, please don’t just write off my request and continue following me anyway. Instead, please message me and I can provide some clarification as to why I have these boundaries and why they are so important to me. (Or you could just simply respect that this is important to me and choose to be the kind of person who is respectful of people’s boundaries regardless of whether or not you understand their reasons for having those boundaries.)
And PLEASE. If you (originally) know me from offline and we have not explicitly discussed whether it is okay for you to follow me, PLEASE STOP FOLLOWING MY BLOG NOW.
If you don’t know me from offline, but you go to the college I attended, please respectfully refrain from reblogging me.
1. I am not here for your education. There are literally tons of blogs, books, films, youtubes, websites, etc. entirely dedicated to educating cisgender people about trans people and about how to avoid being transphobic. If you are really unable to find any of those resources at all, message me and I will point you in the right direction. However, this blog does not serve that purpose. Please don’t follow me in order to learn more about trans people. I do not appreciate it and it is not why I blog here.
2. Please use the correct gendered terms to refer to me and please do not reblog my image or my words to identity-specific blogs without asking me first. My pronouns are he/him/his. I am comfortable with a number of gendered words including man/boy/queen/femme/fem/genderqueer/he. I am uncomfortable with many other gendered words including woman/girl/butch/ftm/she. If you have questions about what words are okay and what are not, please feel free to respectfully ask me. Please do not reblog my image or words to identity specific blogs (e.g. blogs for lesbian women, blogs for ftms, blogs for fat folks, blogs for butches, etc.) or to porn/fetish blogs without asking me first.
3. You can assume that posts under a “read more” cut are ones that I would *not* like to have reblogged.
If you’re unsure whether something is okay to reblog, take a peek at the tags on the post. I often tag things with some variation of “okay to reblog” or “please don’t reblog”. Sometimes I message people to ask them not to reblog something of mine that they reblogged. Usually it’s because I think the post will bring negative attention of some sort to my blog that I just don’t have the spoons to deal with it right then.
4. Please don’t take it personally if I fail to respond to you. I deal with a number of mental health problems including severe anxiety around responding to emails, texts, phone calls, and (you guessed it!) messages on tumblr. I apologize in advance. It doesn’t mean I don’t like you or don’t appreciate what you have to say, I just may not feel able to reply.
Don’t forget to “like” this post to let me know you stopped here on your way to follower-town!
P.S. If you’re just a random person who has found my blog, there is no need to message me to ask if it’s okay to follow me. I appreciate the gesture, but since I don’t know anything about you I can’t really speak to whether you should or shouldn’t follow me. I trust you can self-regulate by reading this post in it’s entirety and understanding what kind of followers make me feel uncomfortable.